Thursday, January 26, 2017
Will the winter of 2017 be the winter of ice? My preference would be snow even the snow of 2015. Just saying that does not jinx anything as my opinion does not determine the weather. Yesterday I ventured down to Chapin and Bri's new house on my daily walk and as I've had to for the last two weeks I had to very carefully choose my footing. I have heard so many stories of people taking bad falls and suffering concussions because of the icy mess we have had for weeks. But I can not stay in. I can only hope for this pattern of rain and ice to end soon. May all those suffering injury heal quickly and completely. So this morning I spent a few minutes looking at pictures of gardens, green grass and flowers. I am also listening to a tribute on the radio to Mary Tyler Moore. Who can turn the world on with a smile? She certainly had an amazing smile and left a lasting legacy of joy and laughter. This is a woman who suffered so on the inside and projected such hope on the outside. What a wonderful example for us all; not to project a false smile but to claim joy amid the struggle, to leave others better for our having been here. Yesterday's Bell Talk day gave voice to so many stories of exactly that. Do not pretend to have no struggles ,no challenges , no sorrow. We have for too long hidden our difficulties hoping to trick others with our outer smile. Let's not forget the message of Bell Talk day but let us live each day claiming our own struggles and being sensitive to the struggles of others. Let's chip away at the ice of silence and allow compassion to grow.
Thursday, January 19, 2017
I watched a clip on Facebook yesterday with a 100 year old woman answering some questions. She was hilarious , delightful and wise. One comment she made stuck with me more than the others." Every day I say thanks for that day even if it was a rotten one" That is something I try to do every day too.I have a routine dialogue to myself when I take my walks. This is one of the main reasons I miss those daily walks if for some reason I don't get to take them. One of the things I say to myself is "Thank you Lord for this day, (insert date).I then list the many things I am thankful for on that particular day. Just as the woman said , some days are rotten. Some days are harder to get through than others. I know the misery of such days but I also know the confidence of somehow finding enough strength to get through such days.. Along with that though is the fear of such days returning or being duplicated. That is the balance I seek. Thankfulness for current blessings, past victories and future assurance. Today I am sheltered in the comfort of my home. A light snow is falling which may lead me to stay inside as the ice I have been so carefully avoiding is now covered. I am very mindful of the consequences of ignoring this danger. My elderly parents are wintering in Florida and my dad calls every few days. My mom used to call every morning like clockwork. Her limited speech has put an end to that. Now after Dad fills me in on things like the weather, their busy, full schedule and a few other items I get to say a few words to Mom. She haltingly replies as best she can and I can get a word or two . I tell her I love her and she tells me she loves me back. Thank you Lord for this day. This day has allowed me one more day of hearing my Dad's words and my mother's affection. This day still finds me as a daughter, a wife, a mother , a grandmother and so much more. This day offers me quiet solitude and an opportunity to write. I can not bring past days back or change what has already been. I can not know what tomorrow will bring or change the course of things to come. But I have today and for that I am truly thankful.
Tuesday, January 10, 2017
Walking up the driveway yesterday I was overcome with the joys of January. I looked toward my home surrounded by a good cover of snow. The veranda roof and dormers held sculptured snow and the smoke was rising from the chimney into the cold air. I knew my warm and comfortable home awaited me. The last stretch always pushes my limits a bit and as I get closer to the house I feel a wonderful exhilaration. I have not put my snowshoes on yet as I am able to walk the road Chapin has plowed and the wood trails Burton has broken with the tractor. But soon I will strap on my snowshoes and head off the beaten paths. I look forward to the months ahead that hold that daily joy. For another winter we will watch the wood pile wane while the heat each piece provides embraces us. The enterprise is a labor of love that I am thankful Burton is still able to deliver. It is who we are and so much more than just a heating choice. I can't imagine a different choice and hope for many more wood burning winters to come. January cold, January sun, January snow ,January days and nights are now my current joy and I will immerse myself in the pleasure they bring.
Wednesday, January 4, 2017
I had a big birthday on Boxing Day. I turned the big 6-0.To be perfectly honest I have been hanging on to the sounds of the last few birthdays happy to claim I was still in my 50's. I saw this one come last year for my best childhood friend. I saw my husband arrive at three birthdays starting with 6. Siblings,friends , sister in laws have gone before me and I knew( or hoped ) I would get there too but really 60 sounds so old. The real jolt is the realization just how quickly the 40's and 50's went. It even seems not that long ago that I was ( like my own children now) in my 30's.But I am here and for the most part very grateful for that. The next decade will hold many blessings, challenges and milestones as have the decades before. So as I welcome 2017 I also embrace the decade of my 60's.The mirror shows my age, my 63 year old husband stands beside me, my aging peer group defines me, my adult kids and growing grandchildren surround me and I claim all my past experiences and hold a treasure of knowledge and wisdom. I still have an active and inquiring mind. I have goals and dreams to pursue. I have accumulated worldly goods that I consider beyond the value of diamonds and gold. From the tiny, premature infant born December 26th sixty years ago I am who I am today. Let the decade begin! This was not my birthday cake. My sister in law Mae made me a lovely one but no one took a picture of it.