Holding on to Hope

My worry list seems a bit long these days. When considering the writing of a blog entry yesterday I felt too bogged down with the items on that list and felt unable to muster up much hope.This morning I feel more able to see the glimmer of the light my blessing list usually offers me. Hope is a powerful force that finds the surface despite what life throws our way. Hope does not change the difficulties but gives us the assurance that we can get through the tough stuff. I do not pretend to have any idea what a person needs to tell themselves when they are given a terminal diagnoses. So much of the hopeful things I hang on to have a timeline stretching into the future. I do know how quickly a life can be over and know first hand how a family deals with the days , months and years after the loss. I try very hard to see the present day as a gift to be savoured and enjoyed. We as a family are taking a journey with Burton's youngest brother.He has returned home to live out however many days he has left. We will take each day , which in reality is all any of us are given. So this day I take a deep breath, I add things to that blessing list and take comfort and strength from the people I love. Today ,I hold on tightly to hope.

Another October Monday Morning

What a lovely fall and beautiful October it has been so far. I did have to wear my winter coat when I went down to get my granddog this morning but that's OK. We really haven't had to have the furnace on too much yet and when we have I welcomed that warm cozy feeling wood heat brings,as the days shorten and the dark evenings descend on us. Burton is in the woods and the winter's wood will soon be brought in. Caleb and Ashlie pulled the carrots yesterday so the garden has been harvested. The leaves continue to fall and cover the lawn and I will not mow again until spring. The leaves cover the wood road and the tall ferns are now brown and bending to the ground. The road is easier to navigate and Burton's daily trips with the tractor are creating more trails to follow. Biscuit, our new addition now happily follows me most days completely enjoying his new found freedom . His gait is quicker and he even gallops which is exactly the right word for his long legs. This morning I will read through my manuscript with the first round of edits complete to make sure every sentence and paragraph are what I want them to be. I hope to finish that today and get back to the book that has been in the forefront of my mind this fall. A few more weeks should finish that one and I will mull over what my next one will be. I have a few more market days before it closes on November 22. I have so enjoyed the weekly interaction with readers, buyers and passerbys. Even if someone walks away with a bookmark I am happy to have made a connection. So today I am reading The Memory Chair out loud to myself as if I were reading it to my class. How wonderful is that? I get to write and I get to read and after the reading there is no playground duty. I do miss the real students though but look forward to my next book that real students will someday hold in their hands.

Days of Being Thankful

We have just finished three days of being thankful. I would like to think that being thankful is something I am everyday. I know some days it is easier to keep a grateful outlook than others but if I take the time to process and reflect I can usually put things in perspective and clearly see how much I have to be thankful for. Being a list maker I sometimes list pros and cons when considering something and often list worries and blessings. Too much time on my hands? Maybe. But often when I see my worries beside my blessings the worries fade and take up less room in my head. Because really as more years on this earth keep teaching me,often the things we worry about the most are things we have no control over. Yesterday,we walked the roadways and paths of Kings Landing. We have been taking our kids on that walk for 28 years. It feels like coming home and just as home goes through changes, Kings Landing has too. I spent eleven summers volunteering there and most of the people I met are no longer working there or have passed away. I predicted that I would see Evelyn still there and was happy to run into her in front of the Morehouse house. It was great to see her. It was somewhat sad to see some of the changes and things deteriorating in buildings, bridges and fences. I hope Kings Landing gets the funding it needs to upgrade the facility. It would be such a shame to let this gem disappear. I certainly understand change. As my kids grew that growth was documented in annual Kings Landing pictures. My fashion and hair styles were also documented. Whenever we are lucky enough to have Meg, Cody and the girls join us for Thanksgiving we will also see our granddaughters in those pictures, as they grow. And I will always be able to find Zac on those roadways, in the houses and barns. When he was twelve he spent a week as a visiting cousin. In his costume which included pants way too short, held up by knitted suspenders and with a straw hat on his head he fit into the scene at the Joslin farm as if he were born in 1878 instead of 1978.So yesterday I took pictures of Chapin, Brianne ,Caleb ,Ashlie and Burton. I got in a picture so that in years to come my outfit and hair can be commented on. Changes will continue and pictures taken in the years to come will document them. We have had another Thanksgiving with so much to remember and treasure and so much to be truly thankful for.

Fog Lifts and Gives Way to Turkeys

Yesterday brought some heavy rain in the morning. The fog lifted in the afternoon bringing beautiful double rainbows which many people photographed yesterday and shared on their facebook pages. This morning the sun shines brightly, the air and the promise of a new week is fresh and inviting. Our troop of turkeys are enjoying a new found freedom now that they are allowed to roam at will through the mostly harvested garden. Their freedom will be short lived, but for today they are in their glory. I love the personalities of turkeys. They are so much more social than chickens and definitely not as nasty as geese. Last week was the 2nd annual Fog Lit Festival. From all reports it was very successful. I attended Words and Wine Thursday night hearing readings from Beatrice MacNeil, Gerard Beirne, Lesley Crewe and Jonathan Roy. Saturday I did a story time at SJFPL with some active and enthusiastic children. I was thankful for the musical offerings of the girls from InterActions. Yesterday I picked Riel up and we spent the morning at the BigTide Brewing Company for Books and Brunch. We enjoyed the good company of other readers and writers at the final Fog Lit event. Clyde Wray and Joan Hovey were the host authors. I enjoyed hearing the readings of Rosi, Annette, Max, Andrea, Rosalyn and Abby as well. Good job and congrats to all the organizers of Fog Lit. I am sure they are breathing a sigh of relief on this sunny ,morning after. So we look ahead to Thanksgiving. I wish our family celebrations could include Meg, Cody and the girls but we will hope for that for next year. Oh so many things to be thankful for! On this day I will, just like the roaming turkeys, concentrate on the blessings and gifts of the day and not let the worry of things to come and things beyond our control cloud this beautiful sunny day.