A Day of Wearing Red and Remembering

The sun is shining this morning and for that I am grateful. Yesterday, the day went from sun to rain to a beautiful rainbow as Moncton buried three of their RCMP officers. A week ago today the terrible act that took their lives and the terror of a city locked down in fear, left behind an unforgettable scar. After a beautiful, moving and overwhelming show of support on the streets of Moncton and in the Coliseum all affected begin again this day to deal with the tragedy. For the wives, children, parents, siblings , extended family and friends in the days, months and years ahead the loss for them will always be present. I pray that they will find their way through those days as best they can, supporting one another and may we not forget their sacrifice. I spent yesterday afternoon in the company of four classes of Grade 5 students at New Maryland Elementary School. Most of them were wearing red to honour the fallen RCMP officers. The librarian, Mrs. Cook had just finished reading them The Year Mrs. Montague Cried. They came to me with lots of questions and comments. I spoke to them about my story of loss and tried on such a sad day in our province to share my experience of living with that loss. I talked about the balance we all must find between joy and sorrow, fear and hopefulness, laughter and tears. As always I looked into young faces and saw such a clear understanding of this aspect of life. I believe in the power of narrative to open dialogue about the difficulties we all face. In a bright, colorful, vibrant building I got to share my writing and a bit of my story. Thank you so much students and staff of NMES for allowing me to spend a part of such a sad day with you.

Dear Author

Yesterday ,I left the beautiful Kingston Peninsula on a Saturday,something I seldom do , to go to the city. I was attending the Dear Author reception at the Saint John Public Library. A few weeks ago I participated in the judging of Dear Author letters that had been submitted by Grade 9 students in the area. They wrote to an author whose book had impacted their lives. We selected ten winners and yesterday we met to give out the awards and hear the students read their moving letters. Congratulations to the winners! In preparing for my remarks I chose to write to an author that has influenced my life. I read the following letter. Dear Lucy Maud Montgomery, I would imagine that you have received thousands of letters from readers since your book Anne of Green Gables was first published in 1908.Today, I am writing one more and telling you how that book, your writing and your life has influenced me. I will begin with the book. I have probably read Anne of Green Gables at least twenty times ;so many times that as I read it I can predict what is on the next page and could probably recite most of the dialogue. As most readers did, I fell in love with the chatty, imaginative, resilient character of Anne, the generous, loving and insightful Matthew and the practical, cautious and caring Marilla. For me though, I think my passion for the book was deeper than just the love of the characters. For me, one of the things I loved about it the most was the words. I still thrill while reading some of the long beautifully crafted sentences and the wonderfully unfamiliar words. There is such music and rhythm in the words. In my first book The Year Mrs. Montague Cried , Taylor writes in her journal about her experience with the sentences and words she encounters when she starts to read Anne of Green Gables. The Year Mrs. Montague Cried Pg. 47 November 22 For me, the other powerful aspect of the book Anne of Green Gables is its sense of place. From Anne's small bedroom , the farm of Green Gables, the Haunted Wood, the Lake of Shining Water, the school house, Avonlea, and PEI itself ; I saw such beautiful, secure, and predictable places. For a young girl who moved too many times and too often, I found in the pages of this book something I so longed for ; staying put, putting down roots that wouldn't be yanked up, being known in and being connected to a place. The Kingston Peninsula ,where I summered as a child and on which my family finally stayed put when I was in grade seven, became this place for me. It was my Avonlea. I happily chose to raise my four children there and still call the peninsula home. I read about Anne's experiences in a one room schoolhouse , her differences with the stern Mr. Philips that ends with the smashing of her slate over Gilbert Blythe's head after Gilbert makes his teasing "Carrots" remark. I saw Anne love going to school again when a new teacher , Miss Stacy comes to Avonlea. This firmly implanted my desire to become a teacher. I greatly admire you as a writer. Despite a life that provided many challenges and little encouragement, you sat down and wrote. After the writing , you set about to get published and even after rejection and discouragement , persevered to become one of the most well known Canadian and international writers of your time. Anne's love of telling and writing stories throughout the series of Anne books also led me toward wanting to be a writer. In my second book Ten Thousand Truths I included an acknowledgement to you. I am one of the world's hugest Anne of Green Gables fans and hold Lucy Maud Montgomery in high esteem. Rachel is my Anne Shirley and Amelia Walton is my Marilla Cuthbert. I applaud the author's determination and tenacity and feel honored to join her in the ranks od Atlantic Canadian authors. May some young reader care about Rachel Garnham as much as I cared about Lucy Maud Montgomery's famous red haired character. Thank you , Lucy Maud Montgomery for writing your books, and sharing your life with the readers of the early 1900's and the readers of the generations that followed. Thank you for giving a little girl in the 1960's a book to love and dreams to dream.

Back From the Rock

Burton and I had a great trip to St. John's where I attended the TWUC's On Words Conference and AGM. It was my second trip to NFLD having gone in 2012 for the Atlantic Book Awards (where I won the Ann Connor Brimer Award ,just saying)We didn't have as much time to enjoy what St. John's has to offer but we did visit George St. a couple of times. We had a lovely supper with Karen and Bill Squires at Greensleeves on Friday night. I went to the Margaret Laurence lecture to hear Guy Vanderhaeghe. His warm and moving talk was an inspiration to everyone in the packed room. I did two signings where I met several very friendly Newfoundlanders and some book buyers. All the best to Samantha.Saturday night we went to the dinner and dance. Boy, do writers ever love to dance. We were led in several Newfoundland dance steps and we were certainly put through the paces. Overall it was a good experience. As much as business meetings are not my favorite way to pass a few hours it was informative to see first hand the running's of the union and to meet the staff and National Council. All the best to outgoing chair Dorris Heffron and congratulations and good luck to incoming chair Harry Thurston.I will certainly consider going to Winnipeg next year although I can't imagine that the dancing will be as good. So now I am back home, June has begun and I must get planting. We went to Sussex for seeds yesterday and so for the next few days I have my work cut out for me. Hopefully I will also get in the lake. I guess we missed a lovely weekend that probably would have gotten us to take the plunge. Thanks to Caleb and Ashlie for mowing the lawn, making garden rows and doing some other chores that certainly made coming home seem even nicer. * Adding to my entry later in the day I am pleased to announce that Burton and I took our first lake swim. For anyone that knows me you will know why that rates an announcement. I am so happy to be back in the lake!

Seeds for Sowing and Food for Thought

Tomorrow is my last writing day before garden season. I am writing my entry this evening after a day of writing so that I don't have to take any time away from my day tomorrow. I am really having a hard time thinking of letting go of my fall, winter and most of spring routine when I can go to my office four days a week and get to spend time doing what I have waited all my life to do. I miss lots about teaching but not at this time of the year, when with summer holidays in sight students and teachers struggle to keep focused. I loved the last day of school feeling but the lead up was always challenging and while I was teaching and raising my kids every bit as busy as Christmastime. So this feels much different. I will stop writing tomorrow and put my energies elsewhere. Firstly, Burton and I will travel to the TWUC On Words Conference in St. John's, Newfoundland. When we come back we will set about sowing seeds. Lots of seeds, in five large sections of ground. Two more sections than last year. Burton is expanding our garden now that he is fully retired. We are happy to be planting more and will try to supply Dave Wolpin at Kredl's Corner Market with whatever excess we produce. He has a very impressive policy of taking produce from local non chemical- using farmers and I applaud his vision. We will sow the seeds and then tend to the gardens every day. I will spend long hours of weeding, hoeing and harvesting. In June I will take some time away from the garden to go to Alberta for two family weddings and to visit Meg, Cody and the girls. At the end of that month I will bring the girls back to the farm for the month of July. Garden in the morning, beach in the afternoon is the plan. What fun we will have! While I am away from my desk I will not be far from the story I am currently working on or from thoughts of the one to follow. I will let my mind wander as I grow the food to feed us , our family ,some friends and some Kredl's customers and to see us through the winter. When I get insight or the characters push through while I am gardening and show me something that belongs in the story, I will run in and jot those thoughts down. I will return to my office in September and get back to it. In the meantime I look forward to taking my books to the market most Saturdays throughout the summer , to meet readers and talk about this wonderful thing I get to do called- being a writer.

On Friends and Family

My last blog entry was on the topic of being a mother. Today on my woods road walk I pondered the topic of friends and family. The more I thought about it the more complicated it seemed. The book I am working on right now is basically about a family that has had some severe dysfunction which resulted in estrangement and separation mostly caused by misunderstandings, feelings of betrayal and years of pride and stubbornness preventing anyone from getting to the root of it all. I realized on my walk that I had in the five hours of standing at the market and talking to several people been witness to a lot of situations in which friends or family are living that same scenario. Boy it's hard maintaining healthy, active and positive relationships with family and friends. Mothers /daughters, sons/ parents, daughters/ fathers, sisters, friends ; all types of relationships that have unravelled. Without giving any details, in talking to people yesterday, I saw and heard of them all. For myself I spoke to a friend that over the years I have drifted apart from. It makes me sad that our friendship is not what it once was. Maintaining relationships with friends and family takes a lot of work. Relationships change of course and distance plays a part in that change. Sometimes the distance is geographic and sometimes it is emotional. It is all very complicated. Sometimes family is not even anyone that is related to you. Sometimes the best father or mother ,sister or brother is one you find, not one that shares your DNA. We can not be all things to all people. When hearing ,seeing or sensing some of the pain or in some cases the pain they so carefully protect anyone from seeing, I wanted to be able to say something that could fix things. In the book I am writing I am trying to do that. I can dig deep and see the causes and manipulate my characters into situations that might bring about healing. In real life it is not so easy and I realize that I can only try to do my best with the relationships that I have. I fall short in so many cases, but I will keep trying.

On Being the Mother

I am writing this morning on the day after Mother's Day. I probably can offer nothing more about being a mother than what has already been said a million different ways on cards , and Facebook quotes but here is my take on being a mother. Having children is not for the faint of heart, but who really understands that when they decide to have a baby. I try not to be the voice of doom when I congratulate the newly pregnant, who are happily awaiting the birth of their first child. " Do you know what you are getting yourself into? " does not seem like a supportive and congratulatory comment. Don't get me wrong , I wouldn't change my choice to have kids but I did not know how heart wrenching being a mother is. Of course the heartbreak of loosing a child is an agony beyond explanation and telling new parents of that is not something I would ever do. I am talking more generally of a mother's heart and the burden or privilege of being a mother and holding that child in your heart forever. Each bump in their journey is a bump you take right along with them. From rushing to pick them up when they fall on their first bike ride to giving them comfort when they have their first broken heart, the job of being the mother never goes away. This morning I acknowledge that role and think of the mothers that I know right now dealing with difficult situations in their children's lives. A close friend of mine is watching as her strong and vibrant son is debilitated ,suffering from a terrifying brain ailment. I am watching someone I love trying her best to support her daughter through a difficult time .I am hearing of a childhood friend now travelling to another province to claim the body of her son and discover the circumstances of his death. I did not intend to make this entry so dark and overshadow the sunny and flowery greetings that yesterday's Mother's Day brought to many .Happy Mother's Day and to mothers everywhere I say Stay Strong, Stay Well, and Stay Thankful for each joy motherhood brings and be proud of the job you do, being the mother.

To Market, To Market

Yesterday another season opened for the Kingston Farmer's market. The market has long been a part of my May to December weekends. I also launched all three books at the market. The top picture was taken on the day of the launch of The Year Mrs. Montague Cried and the other picture of Alida and me was taken at the launch of Ten Thousand Truths. Years ago I sold quilted items at the old market , now known as the Original Kingston Farmer's Market. The Original tries very hard each year to stay open and viable. The new market has certainly taken most of the vendors and shoppers and continues to grow every year. Market loyalties and politics are a long and changing story. For years Burton and I faithfully had our breakfast at the old market. Every Saturday we looked forward to a hug from Alida and a delicious Al and Alida cooked breakfast. The change came when Al passed away suddenly on a Thanksgiving weekend. I now spend my May to December Saturdays at the new market. Their breakfasts will never measure up to breakfasts that the Nutters served for many years. But I got my hug from Alida yesterday. She now walks through the new market as a shopper, greeting her friends and neighbours and many people that will never forget her dedication to a market and her love for her community. I am so thrilled to be able to stand at a table and offer three books that I have written. After years of my life being consumed with teaching and raising my children I now have the time to dedicate to my writing. I love sharing that writing and meeting the people face to face that will read my books. Yesterday I sold books to a wide range of people. I often get asked which one is my favorite or if they were just to buy one which one should it be. It is a difficult question to answer. Yesterday more people bought The Year Mrs. Montague Cried , close to the same number of people bought Ten Thousand Truths and two people bought The Sewing Basket. This morning I had two lovely messages from two of the buyers, who had already finished reading the book they had bought from me yesterday. It is this interaction that will continue to get me up early on Saturday morning and stand for 5 hours. See you at the market!