A Day at QES

It is snowing and blowing. The sun is just about to set and I am already in my jammies. My house is warm and cozy and I am happy to be at my computer and reflecting on the day I had at QES. I was up bright and early. Last week my visit was cancelled when school was cancelled because of snow and freezing rain.I held a small glimmer of hope the couple of times I woke in the night and when I woke up minutes before my alarm went off that maybe it was snowing and school would be cancelled again. I was anxious to go to QES but I still love the moment I hear school is cancelled and I can go back to sleep. My regular routine has me getting up around 8:00 so when I have to get up at 6:30 to get ready for a school visit I always find that a bit challenging. It is however always worth it and today was no exception.I had a great day presenting to the grade 3, 4 & 5 students at QES. The kids were wonderful. They were kind, engaged and attentive. The staff welcomed me and I felt very much at home. I also had the pleasure of sitting in the gym for the concert provided by the Saint John String Quartet. That certainly brought memories of my teaching days when they would come to MCS. I did a writing workshop with 25 kids in the afternoon. As always I was very impressed with the interest and the ability of our young writers.We began with a few writing exercises and then they all started work on a story from the same prompt.Running out of time I wasn't able to hear everyone read their beginnings but the ones I heard were creative and unique. I really hope Danielle, Eric and Mackenzie finish theirs and ask their teachers to send them to me. Brooke had a wonderful beginning. Connor, Luke and Zac started comic strips that looked promising. Abby started a poem. All the students did an excellent job and brought their own imagination and flare to their work.My day held all the good things school visits offer to me. I get a brief taste of the things I loved the most about teaching. I see smiles and expressions and the beauty in each unique child. I get to share my stories, funny, and sad and always receive compassion and honesty.A visit tires me out for lots of reasons but every time I am so glad I had the opportunity to share my work and my writing journey. What a lucky mother,grandmother,retired teacher and author I am Thank you QES!

Why We Should Remember

A year ago a gunman attacked a mosque in Quebec City.Six men were killed and nineteen injured.Lives were ended and lives were changed forever. News coverage ran its course and then it faded in the background as the cycle of every terrible event does. But of course for the people affected it does not fade. Last year I wrote the victims names on paper Ibrahima, Mamadou Khaled, Aboubaker, Abdelkrim, Azzedine and repeated the names of six men who left wives and children, parents, siblings, friends and communities. I carried the piece of paper in my pocket and included the men and their loved ones in my prayers as I walked each day. I gave voice to the tragedy for a short time afterwards and then that faded too.Days, months and a year go by. News coverage revisits it acknowledging the one year anniversary and again we remember. I realize that is the normal course of things. Each day we only hear a fraction of the suffering and terrible events in this world. We receive the somewhat manipulated accounts which give more attention to some tragedies than others. , which focuses on some losses more than others. Some victims and some assailants become household names and some get brief mention. But whether we recall names and details each tragedy leaves behind those who have no choice but to remember.So this morning I say their names again and I hold their loved ones in my prayers. I pray too for all of us because every time hatred and fear walk into a mosque, a Baptist church, a school or drive into a crowd we mourn and we should remember.

A January Monday Morning

I love the ebb and flow of weeks, months and seasons. It is a much different flow than my working life provided for 29 years. The ebb and flow of those days was tied to the school calendar and all the demands teaching brought. I was pulled by the powerful force of teaching and raising kids and running a home.These days the tug is much different and I am more or less in control of it. Yesterday I cleaned and cooked and hosted another Sunday night supper. Brianne after a busy and demanding week was regrouping and looking ahead to exam week which finalizes the efforts of first term before ramping up for the demands of second term. Ashlie talked about her new job which she started this morning after completing her business degree.I am so proud of how she persevered and kept going through all the challenges she has faced.The boys sat watching football taking rest from their many pursuits.Burton and I are at such a different stage and our Monday mornings look so different too. I will sit at my keyboard and prepare my school visit to an elementary school tomorrow then get back to work on my WIP. Burton will finish the farm chores and head to the woods clearing a new pasture for Caleb and Chapin's cattle.I will walk or snowshoe later . Almost every day Burton says" We've got a great life Mrs. White." I could not agree more.I love Mondays and January and all the gifts my life has given me. I love looking ahead to the seasons, a new book launch, a new garden season, a summer visit with our girls. I love my comfortable home , our dwindling wood pile, our evenings , Sunday suppers, time with friends , time to work. This morning I think of Ashlie at her new job and this next stage of her and Caleb's life. Oh how quickly the years go by and land you in another stage. Each stage brings its own challenges and its own rewards.Today I will enjoy the perks of the stage I'm in.

Snowshoeing and Lorenzo

Yesterday was a big day. I awoke feeling weary and a bit disconcerted. I was prepared for my reading on paper but not sure I was as ready in my own head.I planned my day fitting in my walk in (or possibly snowshoe) before lunch so I would have lots of time to get myself together.The fresh blanket of snow called me to the woods and I searched for my snowshoes. After finding them in the garden shed I strapped them on and took off up over the hill. It was a gorgeous day. The sun was strong and the snow was perfect. There were a few slippery spots to be aware of but overall my first snowshoe of the season was spectacular.It makes me anticipate the many snowshoe treks ahead. I had a good talk to myself and for the most part felt on track for the evening ahead.I did have a few doubts to quash and a few insecurities to push away. There is something daunting about stepping in front of a group of people and being part of an event I always regarded as slightly high brow. That of course is my perspective and like most self doubt comes from something we tell ourselves.On top of the hill I stood in the open air staring up at the brilliant blue sky and found my place in the vast scheme of things. That I believe is the key to truly accepting whatever our challenges are. Ashlie picked me up and in we went. Connor gave me a gracious and heart felt introduction and my Lorenzo debut began. The readings were fine. I stumbled through the Q&A with a bit of rambling but overall did OK. I signed a few books and met a few people . I talked to parents of twins I taught in my second year of teaching. I saw some friends and a former colleague. Ashlie and I and joined Andrea, Connor, Dale and Rachel for a lovely meal at Thandi's.I am very pleased to have been asked. I am pleased with the crowd and the response but I definitely felt relief when the night was over.It was lovely standing before an audience and reading my work but the real highlight of my big day was snowshoeing to the top of the hill and taking in the beauty and the peacefulness around me.It is for those moments I am truly thankful.

The Day Before

Months ago arrangements were made for me to read as part of the Lorenzo Reading Series at UNBSJ. I have had the date of January 18th in my mind and have very much been looking forward to it. Over the last few months I have seen the date, my name and the title of the novel I'll be reading from online and kept the anticipation close. A few weeks ago it was announced in the Telegraph Journal's Salon section. The bio attached was completely incorrect and even though I didn't see it I know many people questioned my being credited with film making and award winning movie directing. A false bio somewhat undermined my real one and I had to remind myself that my true accomplishments were something to celebrate as well. Last night still possibly being on Alberta time, I laid awake for what seemed a very long time. In that wakefulness I questioned everything about my own ability. I am struggling somewhat with my current edits having trouble keeping the tense consistent. Last night I practiced my readings for tomorrow night and found my self wanting to fix a few things. I remember hearing Joan Clark read and her saying she always wants to fix or revise as she's reading. I guess that's a normal thing. My Mom as she used to set a pie or a something else she baked in front of us always said it wasn't as good as usual or it was probably not sweet enough. I guess whenever we present something we have created we tend to see the flaws. Last night I was convinced I had no credibility , I shouldn't have been asked to read and so on and so on. So here I am on the day before. I know nerves will kick in. I know I will have to muster all my confidence and courage. I also know that people will be gracious. I have some credibility. I will prepare and hopefully sleep well tonight and I will stand behind the podium and take the evening in and for each minute and each interaction I will be grateful.

Perfectly Happy Exactly Where I Find Myself

I just returned from a walk in the woods. This is something I try to do everyday and without exception when I do I return better for it. We have had a stretch of bitter cold weather and I only braved it to walk twice in the last two weeks.What I missed on those cold days I was given tenfold on the walk I took today. Now according to the best laid plans I am supposed to be in Alberta. Burton and I got up at 3:00 yesterday morning and drove to the airport. Our flight was not to be. At first we were put on Standby along with five other people because of a weight restriction . We waited and then were told the flight to Toronto was not going at all. Now some of the others around me were angry and I am not saying that not being angry makes me anything special but I figure people in charge of flying planes know more than I do and so for someone to make that call doesn't seem like a personal affront to me. I believe that just being fortunate enough to afford to go visit my daughter and granddaughters is a privilege not to take lightly.I also feel that I would rather be heading home after a cancelled flight then heading into the sky in an airplane that might not be safe. Seems a given to me. Burton,the irate woman behind us or I shouldn't be the one deciding whether the plane goes or not. So we went to bed last night expecting to leave early again this morning and fly to Montreal. I checked the flight status at 3:00 and our Montreal flight was cancelled. After calling Air Canada I was told it was because of runway issues. Again,I am not the one who should say the runway is fine because my granddaughters want to see me today. The helpful young man on the phone gave me several options and upon deciding which one worked the best for us he re-booked us. Now when I posted on FB several people made a comment that this was ridiculous. I disagree. What I think would be ridiculous would be for airlines to give in to entitled people claiming that their plans were more important than safety. So today as I walked down the beautiful snowy road in the bright sunshine and moderate temperature I couldn't help but feel to my very core that I was exactly where I was supposed to be. We will get to Meg's tomorrow or we won't. I will depend on professionals making that call not me based on my desire to prevent my granddaughters from being disappointed. I think they would be a lot more disappointed if Monkey and Toad were injured or killed in an airplane crash.So I hope to travel tomorrow and will be thrilled to see Meg, Cody, Emma and Paige but today I am perfectly happy to be exactly where I find myself.

Come out of the Bathroom

I find myself in the bathroom several times a day. No cause for alarm just a desire to take in the beauty of my renovated bathroom. I promised pictures months ago when the reno started and the finished room was just a vision in my head. The process was steady and we managed just fine taking advantage of our spa retreat at Chapin and Briannes across the road but it is so wonderful to have our upstairs bathroom back. There are a few details left to attend to;touch up painting, light fixtures to install and a few more pictures to hang but for the most part it is done and I enjoy walking in and taking it in. Now the decision is bath or shower. I love baths but a shower in my lovely new walk-in shower is tempting too. But this morning my task at hand is to get to the first round of edits on my spring release Y/A novel titled Headliner. I am anxious and nervous at the same time. There are some issues to tackle and a few things to resolve. Under the professional guidance of Penelope Jackson I will work away at the manuscript to get it ready for publication. I love this process and am so thankful for the opportunity to do it for the seventh time. Just a couple of housekeeping items to attend to and then I will get down to work. Intermittently I will venture into my new bathroom and gaze out the new window at the snowy fields and hills and remember the start to finish process that brought it to where it is now. As I consider that I will also ruminate on the start to finish journey I am taking with another book and take great pleasure in that.